By Dr. Evan Parks—Is being at the end of your rope, exhausted, and overwhelmed a sign that leadership is not for you? Absolutely not! Despite the image we may have of the rock solid, strong, decisive leader, real leadership involves doubt, struggle, and discouragement. Coming to an end of ourselves is just what we need to become better leaders. Here are four qualities that leaders develop over time and through trials.
1. Confidence
As we enter into leadership positions, we rely on our natural skills, talents, and abilities. Our natural abilities have often led to our being put into a leadership position and have helped us succeed. The day will come in any leader’s life where his natural abilities run out or he is overwhelmed with the demands of leadership. At this point, a leader must recognize that he is not adequate.
Recognizing our inadequacy is essential to our personal and professional growth as leaders. We are not smart enough to know all that we need to know. We are not wise enough to handle all the interpersonal challenges. We may lack the character needed to be the person who does what is right regardless of the circumstances. Recognizing and owning our inadequacy opens the door for us to depend on others and turn to mentors and other leaders for help and support.
2. Enthusiasm
A leader is like a bank. A bank provides money that others need in order to finance their goals, plans, and aspirations. A leader lends energy to others so they can move forward, especially at times when drive, hope, and faith are scarce. A leader is able to say with conviction and spirit, “These are tough times, but we are tough people! If there is anyone who can rise to the challenge and overcome these problems, we can!” Leaders are able to loan their strength to others and give life back to those who have all but given up.
3. Inner Peace
Every leader is faced with difficulties that are beyond their ability to handle. This is overwhelming. While we cannot avoid challenges and change, the leader has the special responsibility to learn how to allow the stress and tension of the moment not to define how they act and think. They develop the ability to picture the stress they are facing as a wave that slowly rises and immediately begins to recede. The wave will come and go without our needing to do anything to stop it or change it.
When leaders have the presence of mind to be accepting, open, and even curious about the challenges that surround them, they experience an inner calmness that is felt and absorbed by others. You might recognize this most easily between parents and children. During times of crisis, children are able to handle the stress to the degree their parents are calm and hopeful. Parents who lack inner peace have more distressed children.
4. Integrity
Often the first picture that comes to mind when we use the word integrity is the image of a leader who is honest, such as a leader who handles financial issues ethically and legally. Honesty is an element of integrity, but it is not the whole picture.
Integrity has to do with being whole, sound, or complete. No matter where you look in the life a of person of integrity, you will see the same soundness and good character. There are no hidden areas.
A leader with integrity has the ability to create and maintain trust between people. They do not use people to get things done and then walk away from the relationship. They build alliances. They are also able to see and face reality. Leaders with integrity see and accept what does not work, what is not good—they do not try to hide problems. Conflict is embraced as an opportunity for growth and a sign that something is not right. A key sign of integrity is the ability to recognize within yourself limitations, faults, and problems and work to come up with ways to address these effectively.
Finally, a leader with integrity is able to see that there is a greater meaning behind all that they do. They desire to make an impact in the lives of others and leave a legacy for those they love.
Let me know the challenges you face in leadership! I am looking forward to hearing from you.
